I’m not gonna lie. I am feeling quite nervous coming into the new year knowing very well that thirty to thirty-five will be the next age bracket I'll be ticking on the next form I fill up (who checks these forms anyway). Breathe in, breathe out, You’re going to survive this. *runs to mirror again to check if any more white hair popped up. OMG, five new strands? Crieeesssss*
Okay, white hair jokes aside. I feel super blessed that I am turning thirty in this particular day and age. The year of 2017. Been thinking a lot this year (and writing less as you can see, sorry!), and I couldn’t be more grateful to be alive in this era. I’m not sure if you feel it too, but I think we’re living in exciting times right now.
Probably the best of times for women, where our successes are embraced and encouraged much more. And the typical expectations that were attached to women have changed in a good way. I’d be naive to say there isn’t still some expectations. But not like what was expected during our mothers' generation.
Had my life now, been taken back to my mothers' generation, I would totally be seen as quite the failure because on an eligibility paper, this is me. Soon to be thirty, loves her job, divorced once, no children, and doesn’t own a house or car (although I am in the process of renting my own house, woohoo, but I’ll save that for another post). And, can barely cook. I can make juice and smoothies for days, and a mean yogurt bowl, though. Okay, fine that doesn’t count as cooking.
So juicing aside, I genuinely believe and feel that we’re living in exciting times to be a woman. I don’t think that our mothers felt all this permission to be all the things that we are now. What a blessing it is to be able to chase our dreams. To be successful in our careers. To not put ourselves last in our relationships. To go for what we want, whether it’s initiating a marriage proposal or asking for a pay raise.
Today, I feel women are learning more, they’ve started thinking, they’re exposed to more and therefore much smarter. If there’s something universal that I’ve learnt from the Quran is that God has gifted each of us are with different skills and potential. And, it is within us to do something about that passion. That is our purpose. To serve our Creator by doing the most we can with the innate passion we’re given in this life, while we have it.
And with that, it has to be said that we, as women, we are already complete on our own. Regardless of what our culture has embedded in our thoughts, what I've gathered from my journey of learning the true meaning in the Quran and the life of past heroes is that we don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. If you come across a man who compliments the life you've built or want to build, then that calls for a huge celebration. But if he hasn't come along, it's all good. That is an added gift and one of the ways to do more goodness. But don't make that your purpose. On your own, God created you complete to serve your purpose. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Don't stop yourself from living a beautiful and full life just because yours isn't the same as the next woman.
So whether you're about to turn twenty, thirty or fourty, I hope you'll realize that we are truly blessed to be alive in this era. Women are respected for who we are and what we do. We may not be able to have it all, but know that we have every permission to create our own path, our own happily ever after.
I'll end this post with a throwback photo of my twenty-six-year-old self. But, as much as I miss that age, I like the soon to be thirty-year-old me better because now I'm not afraid to go for what I want.
May Allah swt, the All-Provider open doors for opportunity for all of you to go for what you want, to continue to learn more about this beautiful faith, and be the best versions of ourselves.
I'm so ready for 2017 and hope you are too! ;)