Saturday, 28 May 2016

Love, Actually continued...


Picking up from where I left off yesterday morning. Sorry I couldn't get myself to finish it last night as I said I would, because I was just having too much fun hanging out with my mum and friend in the living room over some juice and random chit chatter about life and Leonardio Dicaprio. 

So as I said previously, a handful of people inspired us to create the #modernromance story and one of them is this dear friend of mine. Boy has she been (and still going) through a lot. But she's a champion. Although not too long ago, she lived in denial for way too long and found herself imprisoned by these two words, qadr and sabar. See I feel, there is too much misconception and misunderstanding on what these words actually mean in our life. 

I want to speak about sabr first. What usually happens is, when something bad or negative happens in our life, you (or the person doing it to you) will tell you to just sit through the yucky situation in the spirit of being sabr. And so this is what she was told to do, to stay sabr. She was told this by her husband, local imams, some friends too, all in the name of Islam (because to them, if she was a devout believer, she would accept that this is what's written for her).

So she stayed "sabr" through years of being constantly lied to, cheated at, mentally and physically abused by her husband. Oh yes, you read that right. And to top it all of, when she questioned why this is happening to her, he would say this is your qadr (what is written for us), hence why you should have more "sabr" and learn to deal with it better. 

Sabr is not about sitting idle and just accepting it because it is our qadr. It is accepting that yes, we are in this yucky situation, but we must be proactive to better the situation, and simultaneously turning to the controller of all, Allah, to get us out of it. Sabr is a verb.

It was only after she changed her perspective on this word, did she stop lying to herself or allow others to lie to her. She made a conscious effort to be honest with herself and ditch being in denial. She realized there is a way out of this and Allah will make it happen for her. And it did. Even with a handful of kids up her sleeve, she managed to start her own business and gain her self confidence back! And, a separation is well on its way.

She is confident now to not let people tell her that she has to accept being stuck in an abusive and polygamous relationship. She's confident now to not let others misuse Islam and Prophetic sayings to convince her stay in this marriage. She's confident now to see that she can survive and be happy again, without him. 

Whilst we all want a man in our life, sometimes happy ever after means fighting to let go, losing it, and starting fresh. Better things are always ahead of us. :)

I'm going to leave you guys with this, and hopefully continue with my next #modernromance story sometime this week. This is the story of my sister and how she fought through her marriage only to end up truly, madly, deeply in love with her husband, and vice versa after almost nine years of being married (that's a lot of years to wait, yikess! hahaa)

Speak soon insyaAllah! xx

Friday, 27 May 2016

Love, Actually


Love To Dress dress / dUCk scarf

As you guys know, LtD's Eid collection will be launching really soon *excited*. And behind every collection, there is a story that I hope will connect us LtD women in one or more ways. This collection was a really personal one to myself and to a few other close friends and family of mine. It's about romance and finding your true love. But most importantly, understanding how to find happiness whether you're still on that journey of finding it, or have found it, and got married, only to realize it wasn't what you expected.

See more than five years ago I got married, but both myself and my ex decided it was best to separate as he admittedly said he wasn't ready for all of what marriage entailed. Thank God and praise Allah though, it ended on a positive note, so that was all good. Then, last year I thought I had found this almost perfect guy (he ticked a lot of the boxes in my husband criteria list, except a few important ones). Crazy thing was, he actually proposed and we were set to be married. But, in came Allah, who decided He needed to help save me from something I wasn't able to foresee at that time. So guess what happened? A month before the wedding date, it got cancelled. I know. I was even more shocked, trust me. Seems like a sad story, but it's a happy one, I promise. And now as I write this I can't help but say Thank Godddd that didn't happen. Literally Allah started revealing to me things I was blinded by while I was smitten with him, one thing after another after we had parted ways.

Okay, so I'm looking at the time and I've got an early morning appointment, which means I'll need to pause here. I'm planning on continuing tonight inshaAllah, so let's hope I'm not distracted by anything else so I can sit and share all that I've got going on in this head of mine. In the mean time, have a productive Friday!

Speak to you guys in a bit! xx

PS: Don't forget to follow @lovetodress to see more of the dress I'm wearing in the picture up there. ;)

Tuesday, 24 May 2016

Loving Routines



Ahhh finally, some time for the blog! How are you guys? I hope everyone is well! I don't know how many times I've said this, but I really miss sharing things with you guys here, and I totally feel it when I've been away from the blog. This past month has been so hectic it took a toll on me for sure.

In between traveling and trying to meet deadlines, I regretfully let myself slip out of my usual routine, which now I realize is so so important for my sanity. It got to a point where my mum thought I was depressed because I just wasn't my usual self. I barely saw my mum and friends, didn't get my usual intake of fresh juice and the time I would usually spend with the Quran became almost non-existent. I used to think routines were lame and boring. Always the type to just go with the flow. But now, I don't think going with the flow works for me anymore. I know now just how much I need to do the little things I do daily, that actually have such a big impact. 

It got to a point where my mum sat me down and asked me if I was depressed because I was lonely. -________-  So typical of her to always assume problems will arise due to the fact that I'm not married yet, hahahaa.  

No, mum! I'm not feeling lonely. I've just been really busy and out of sync.  

Are you sure? Do you want to speak to a psychiatrist?

No mum. I can't afford to speak to a stranger that's gonna charge me my lunch money for the month. 

Goshh I have such random conversations with my mum, but I missed it! Alhamdulillah, I've managed to crawl back into the good old routine and am smiling again, and back here writing. So, yes to routines and sticking to them regardless of where I am in the world or how busy I get! I wonder if you guys have routines too. If you do, I hope you stick to yours as well and not let yourself get out of sync to a point that your mum asks you to speak to a psychiatrist, hehee. 

Till the next post! xx

Sunset in Saudi


Love To Dress Cardigan & Blouse / Zara pants & heels / dUCk scarf / Chloe bag

If there's one thing I miss when I get busy is catching a glimpse of sunsets like this. There's just something so calming about it and a feeling that's truly nourishing for the soul.

Rewinding back to when I was visiting my sister in Saudi over a month ago (before the busy work month started). It was my last hour there before I had to leave for the airport. The weather was gorgeous outside, cool breeze and an open space, perfect for an evening stroll just outside her house. Both my sister and I were so sad our trip ended because we had such an amazing 2 weeks together. It surely made us closer than what we were already, and that's just priceless.

My trip there was unexpectedly epic, and a big part of its awesomeness was the road trip from Makkah to medina. We got to kind of experience a little bit of our amazing history as we drove through the sandy landscape, with our eyes glued to the huge rocky mountains that were once a pathway for our Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) and his people. And we couldn't stop counting camels. Apparently they're more expensive than cars, so there's no such thing as a stray camel (in case you were wondering like I did). I always thought going for Umrah would be hectic, but it was far from. Perhaps it was because I went with my sister and her hubby who go there every other month since they live so nearby. So they were totally chilled and it rubbed off on me. Take your time to take it all in with every step you take there. I get now why the experience others have there is so personal and precious. It's in those moments that whilst you're surrounded by thousands, it somehow felt like it was just you and Allah. It was as if I had Allah all to myself. There to listen to my private ramblings, my wants and hopes. And seeing sunrise at the Kaabah. Too beautiful for words, I can't even.

I hope each and every one of you guys who is reading this get your own epic Umrah trip and that we will all live long enough and be blessed with rezeki so we to get to go again and again inshaAllah. May Allah swt nourish our souls with every effort we can do within our means to get closer to Him, be it an Umrah trip or simply speaking intimately with Him. :)

Thursday, 19 May 2016

#Modernromance



It still amazes me till today how one thing can spark inspiration to a point that it becomes the voice of an entire collection. And the voice of this collection was a romantic one.

'..They are (close) as garments to you, as you are to them'.
(Al Baqarah : 187)

The want to pursuit true love is something that God has put in all of us. Us women, we desire to love, and be loved, just as how we want to feel beautiful. We want to be wrapped with love and care, just as much as we want to be draped in dresses that make us feel simply beautiful in our own. And so this collection is all about embracing the romantic in us.

I turned to a time where clothing was as romantic as it can be, well to me at least. Think 19th century dresses. Jane Austin. I loved every bit of the femininity they exuded. The romanticism of ruffles, playful take on pleats, empire waist dresses and delicate details like the picot hem. I fell in love with these timeless elements taken from the 19th century garments, and just had to incorporate them into this upcoming collection for Eid. 
 
Every day spent perfecting and evolving the six designs, to what they are now, was all totally worth it. Each with their own elegant silhouette and romantic detail, especially on the sleeves. I can't hardly wait for these dresses to be launched (very soon inshaAllah) so you can have it in your wardrobe too! I hope you'll love the modern take on romantic dressing in this #LtDEid2016 collection.

If you want to see more of the dresses, and find out more on the story behind this collection, stay close to LtDs instagram @lovetodress okay. ;)